Imaginary Conversations and Random Thoughts

No, no, no. Not that Boner. The other boner.

The walrus boner up for auction in Beverly Hills. The thing sold for $8000.

Follow the link to Boing Boing to see what a fossilized, 12,000 year old penis looks like.

I don't have to follow the link. If I want to see a four and a half foot penis, all I have to do is look in my pants. Whoa! Giggity-giggity-giggity, allllll right!

Actually, I pulled a Wrath of Khan job up there, where inches seem like feet.

Although, I'm not sure if this really qualifies as a sweet dream. First, the background. One of my must reads each day is Ace, over at Ace of Spades HQ. He's got a few guest bloggers chipping in from time to time, one of whom, Gabriel Malor, has been doing some really interesting posts lately. He adds some smarts to the place. Ace made a good call giving him a chance.

One of the ways Ace gets stories is by putting out his feelers, in the form of readers, who send him tips on interesting items. One of these tipsters is called dri. I know nothing about dri. I don't know if anyone knows anything about dri, except that we should call dri, dri.

And that was enough for me. Until the dream. And the dream disturbs me.

I'm standing in line at some event. Not like Mr. Toad's Wild Ride at Disneyland or anything. More like the line to get into an event that is not a sporting event, but which is held in an arena of one sort or another. It's a longish line. Maybe it's a concert, or, disturbing possibility number one, perhaps I'm in line to try out for American Idol.

Now just to keep the yahoos in line, the arena has naturally hired security. As is sometimes the case, the security comes in the form of off-duty police officers. As I move up a ways in line, I notice that one officer had a name bagde that says "dri." Officer dri turns out to be a rather mannish female police officer. Short, but not quite butchy red hair. Slender, but without looking petite or soft. Wiry might be a good word for it. So I mention to Officer dri that I think I might have heard of her. And she says, "From the comics, right?"

This is so not the answer I was expecting. From the comics? Officer dri went on to explain that she had been doing some freelance work on Silver Surfer, and would soon be leaving Law enforcement to write and draw the comic full time.

Before I could learn any more, before I could even mention Ace, the line moved once more, and I was cut off, never to see Officer dri again.

Later, but still in the dream, Ace broke the story of dri's move to comic books. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to memorize Ace's entire post. The only words of Ace's post to make it across the veil to wakefulness were these:

" . . . they engage in more than the usual internettery wittery.

At amateur code-compiler Stan Lee's house, they divide into two teams. Using Stan's codebreaking techniques, each team attempts to derive a comedy skit from the math homework of Stan's seventh grade niece . . . Later, the losing team has thirty minutes to prepare, and then they perform the winning team's skit . . ."

The second disturbing aspect of this dream is that this party is way cooler than any party I've ever gone to.

All pictures are courtesy of a slideshow attached to this AP story about the Utah miners found at Yahoo News.

The story was found at Yahoo News.

The miners are still missing.

Look, you should probably just skip this post.

I don't always have the best of taste.

Get out while you still can.

At this point, you can't say I didn't warn you.


A brief and very strange interview was held earlier with Utah mine boss Robert Murray. Since the collapse of the mine, Murray appears to have suffered a nervous breakdown:

He said he later dropped out of a debriefing with federal officials and began wandering around the mine yard in the moonlight, reliving the collapse. He said he broke down.

"I came apart," he said. "I was under a doctor's care . . ."

It may be this breakdown that led to the bizarre behavior exhibited during the interview.

". . . and then I take my hands away and say Peek-A-Boo! My little granddaughter just laughs and laughs . . . Umm . . . are we starting now?"


"Look, I know the families have some complaints about how the situation has been handled, but it says right here in these contracts, that if any miner dies, we get his firstborn to take his place. Is that so hard to understand?"


"Hell, sometimes we just hire a new guy and I simply eat the kid, bare-handed cannibal style. Just rip 'im to shreds! Tastes like chicken."


"It helps that I have such good, strong nails. I get regular manicures, did you know that? Just got one this morning. All the ladies are jealous of my nails. Sometimes, when I've had a manicure, I like to caress my nails."


"Oh crap! I think I forgot to unplug the coffee pot!"


"I'm outta here. If that coffee pot burns up, why, that'd be a real disaster!"



Yeah. Probably too soon.

I guess it's been sort of a busy time lately for me. We took some time to go on vacation, for which there may be some pics later. We traveled on the road of death.

Huh. I just realized that this summer I've been on one of the deadliest beaches in California, and on one of the deadliest roads in California. Who knew I was death defying?

We saw the Harry Potter movie. Brief review: While every Potter movie has to cut a lot of material from the book to keep the film a manageable length, this was the first movie in which major events that shouldn't have been cut, were.

We saw Transformers. Brief review: Pretty much the same as the first Spider-Man, and Lord of the Rings. They didn't screw it up, and it was pretty damn good. Also, it will be a good time even if you aren't a Transformers fan.

We were fortunate enough to get a new car, a 2008 Highlander. Seems pretty nice so far. If there's any interest, maybe I could put together more about that as well.

We also did a major house cleaning, upstairs, downstairs, file cabinets, in the office. Even more major was the garage cleaning. Don't even ask.

Also, since our area is sort of sprawling into the countryside a little, we've encountered a situation that might be called the "Summer of a Zillion Wasps." Even Miss Tori, who really is a saint, and has compassion for all living things (did I mention we were in the drive through, and she noticed a praying mantis on the windshield wiper, and she got out of the car to pick it up and place it on a nearby tree?) has taken part in the battle against the wasp.

Actually, it kind of reminds me of how Mrs. Weasley opened up the whup-ass there in book seven. Which reminds me that at Mugglenet.com, I took the Sorting Hat quiz, and it said the character I was most like was Arthur Weasley, and my house is Ravenclaw. Funny how that worked out.