Thursday, July 05, 2007


Not By The Hair Of My Chinny-Chin-Chin

I shaved my beard,
and it feels weird.
My chin is bare;
there's nothing there.

A little poetry for you. It does feel weird. The first thing I noticed was a nice nick that bled for a while. Apparently when you haven't shaved for a while, the skin gets all nice and tender. When you do shave, it's not always tough enough to resist the razor. I probably cut myself shaving once in this past year, but now I've cut myself at least once every time I shaved this past week.

It all started with a moustache that's been around for, well, this month is probably pretty close to the twentieth anniversary of having it. There was a full beard in there for a while, maybe a year or so around year ten. Then it was reduced to just a goatee for the last nine years or so. Miss Tori wanted to know what I was like without it, and so, for her, the unthinkable was done.

The second thing I noticed was that my upper lip and chin suddenly felt a lot cooler. All of the rest of me was one temperature, and that patch of bare face was about five degrees less.

The third thing I noticed is that my mouth seems so tiny! It's like Frank Burns over here! Maybe I'll get used to it.

The fourth thing I noticed is that for the first two or three days, I couldn't stop touching it.

The first thing Miss Tori noticed is that I look a lot younger. Maybe even younger than her! The second thing she noticed is that I'm now a lot cuter. However, there's no way I'll ever be cuter than her.

Still, none of these things would necessarily convince me not to grow it back. one thing did.

The fifth thing I noticed is that I can eat much messier foods, much more easily, when I've shaved. Facial hair is like a magnet for every crumb and sauce and bit of food that gets anywhere near your mouth. That problem has been solved.

Of all the reasons to keep shaving, I'm the sort of dork who picks a reason that has nothing to do with how it looks.
You are not a dork, you're a lovable little hubby!
...and you were just as cute before, silly!
This from the woman who played the singularity card on the lady who thought the transformers movie wasn't very realistic, so she ought to know. Thanks honey!
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