Thursday, January 20, 2005


Asset Management

Alternate title: I still hate jerks.

There was a discussion about personal assets and using them to get what you want over at Witty Sex Kitten’s place a couple of weeks ago. So what better time to chip in than after everyone’s forgotten all about it. That discussion is here. You go remind yourself now!

I guess it boils down to good looking gals using that advantage to gain the sort of small favors that grease the wheels of their lives. One of the commenters noted that guys can do it too, and he has taken advantage of his looks in a similar fashion. I’ll take his word for it, as my own personal experience is not of that sort.

Some people object to this practice on the part of those who might be considered the aesthetic elites among us. These objections seem to imply that it is somehow improper, even shallow, to use looks to advantage. And there is a sort of smug satisfaction that they seem to feel when they point out that looks aren’t forever, that while there will always be hot twenty-six year olds, you’ll just get older and uglier.

Why the animosity? Do we look at great thinkers and gleefully imagine the day when they are old and senile and down at our mental level? Did people wish Parkinson’s on Picasso so he would be a less able painter, just like the rest of us? Do we sit around watching Michael Jordan and think about how we can’t wait for him to get so old that he can’t pull it off anymore? Unless we’re on the opposing team, no. And there’s your why. The Aesthetic Elites are doing something that we can’t, and some of us don’t like it. They’re jealous.

I’m just not sure I could honestly condemn someone for using one personal attribute (or maybe I should have said pair of attributes), while at the same time accepting and maybe even admiring someone who uses some other personal attribute (athletic prowess, intelligence, charm, charisma, courage, etc.) to get ahead. Who am I to judge? And how could I blame them anyway? They wouldn’t be doing it if it didn’t work, and the only way it works is if someone (usually of the opposite sex), some thinking person, lets it work. Face it, no matter how good looking you are, you still can’t walk through a solid brick wall, not even if you’re Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston’s kid. Turns out, positive results encourage behavior, while negative results discourage behavior. Go figure. That would probably explain why you never hear about someone getting their hand caught in a blender for a second time.

I don’t have a problem with good looking women marketing the assets, as it were. More drool fuel for me. Where I do have a problem is when the assets put an unqualified person in my way. Most times I just look and enjoy, so maybe it’s karma every time I run into a hot ditz running the register or taking my order. Think about it. How many hot chicks are working the grill at Burger King? If your answer doesn’t rhyme with hero, you’re fooling yourself. The hot chicks are always all over the register, putting out a pretty face to the public. It’s the non-hots that do the grunt work.

Which I’m all in favor of if the hottie can actually do her job. If she can’t, no amount of hotness is going to make me a happy customer. Well, maybe if there was a little touching involved. So I guess the final answer is that I hate stupid jerks, even when they’re hot babes.

Actual Update: Yeah, so I'm number eight of 388000 on Yahoo's search for "stupid random conversations". Go me!
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