Friday, August 27, 2004



So I take a look at Ye Old Chronometer of Doom and didn’t quite like what I saw. See, you plug in your vitals, and it tells you when you’re going to die. Without getting too specific, let me just say that I am a year past the halfway point. So I guess it’s all downhill from here. That sucks.

The only thing I have going for me is that Mrs. Elder Prime made it to her 80’s before she died. Elder Prime was her second husband. Original Elder Prime went early, maybe 50’s or so. There’s some murky questions about my heritage, so Mrs. Elder Prime is the only old blood relative I can rely on for hope.

But look. It’s the 21st century. If I croak before at least 80 I’m going to be seriously ticked off. I gotta pick up some years somewhere. Maybe I’ll be like the Insta-incubus and maintain eternal youth by draining the souls of other, lesser bloggers. Sure, he says he’s just reaping the benefits of being an early nanotech adopter, but we know the truth. And by truth I mean we know it’s more fun to make up phony testaments to his unholy glory.

Anyway, you can find the hour of your own doom here. You go look now!
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