Thursday, June 24, 2004


Are You Sad? Happy? Nice? Nasty?

Sad people are nice. Angry people are nasty. And, oddly enough, happy people tend to be nasty, too.

That’s just the first couple of lines. And it’s not as grim as it sounds. Happy people aren’t pure evil. The article didn’t really address whether or not purely evil people are happy. I do have a recognizably evil laugh in my humor repertoire. Does that count? If I’m a nice guy, does that mean I’m sad? Sometimes I wonder. I don’t feel like I’m a sad person, but I guess I am sad sometimes. Doesn’t everybody get sad sometimes? Besides, isn’t feeling sad the only way you know you were feeling good? Does anybody remember when Satan sang, “Without evil there would be no good, so it must be good to be evil sometimes”?

Now that I’m done with this committee, I’m off on another objective and I won’t see these fun people for a while. That’s a reason to be sad. At the same time, I can keep my own hours on my new assignment. I’m almost completely free of supervision. It’s nice not to be directly responsible to another on a daily and hourly basis. That’s a reason to be happy.

I need more books I guess. Let me give you a brief timeline. On my own. Ton of books. No cable. Eventually, some would say in spite of myself, I got married. Then I got cable. Suddenly books were way down on the list. I went from reading all the time, with some TV, to mostly hanging out with wifey, some TV, and almost never time for reading. That was a full schedule. Now wifey is gone. I’ve still only got some TV. And there’s a lot of hours left over. Now I’m out of the habit of reading. Ask me later. I guess I’m just bored. And conflicted. I hate people, but I crave human contact. There’s a Randall moment for you. I hate people but I love gatherings. Life is weird.

And it’s all Princess Wolfie’s fault. And mine for not reining in these foolish thoughts about her. I know better. I’m a grown man, with occasional immature tendencies. Still, I should know better. This is why I keep putting off talking about her. The feelings are great, but if I think too much, the rational universe starts creeping in. Stupid reality. That’s enough of that for now. Maybe I’ll go practice guitar for a bit. Ask me later about my sausage-y fingers.

Ok back home again. After all my whining, it turns out Princess Wolfie and I are going to another meeting next week. See what I mean about fate and faith? If not, ask me later.
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